They also struggle to understand other peoples emotional distress, so they just dont know how to react. 2. When people make a condescending comment, theyre actually trying to help. If people are regularly condescending towards you, there may be a reason. But then once youve acknowledged what theyre saying, you can say what you think in a calm way and youll have a better chance of your message getting through to them. One of the most hurtful things condescending people do is tell you how to feel. WebThere are several different ways that you can deal with condescending people, depending on the circumstance as well as the people involved. You know this is just something they do maybe because thats the way theyre used to talking to others. Im Not Immature For Having Emotions People may accuse you of being immature just because you express emotions. One of the frustrating things about condescending people is that they often dont know theyre doing it, so its almost impossible to change them. And thats okay. When dealing with a condescending person, it is important to remain professional and maintain your composure. Theyre so focused on what they need and what they want that they cant get out of their own way. If theyre rude, youre within your rights to simply walk away and let them be their own audience. Theyre always looking at the world from their own perspective and they only care about their own personal needs, so they cant understand why others would be upset or offended. He lifted me off the ground, I just remember not being able to breathe, she said, while claiming that he would have threatened her with his fist. 8. If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. You keep calm and carry on. They interrupt you when you are speaking to correct things like your pronunciation or recollections. I'm definitely not listening. It is important to differentiate rudeness from abusive behavior. With more than 20 years of experience, she specializes in hybrid therapy and coaching services, couples counseling, and clinical hypnotherapy. People who say Any combination of these factors could lead a person to adopt a condescending attitude toward those around them. If this is the case you have come to the right place. 15 Actions You Can Take To Stop It, 17 Red Flags In Friendships That Change Everything, Wish Your Loved One A Peaceful Sleep With These 71 Inspirational Goodnight Quotes. 12. Theres nothing worse than dealing with a condescending person. Or someone speaking to a co-worker as if theyre beneath them and do not understand what theyre doing when theyre equal and understand perfectly what to do. WebWait for the other persons anger to calm down before approaching them. That way, you can pick up on the thoughts or feelings behind the words they say. WebWhen communicating with a condescending person, pause for a moment. When they act superior, let them. See additional information. Someone might look away because they feel shy and find it easier to []. << The Art of Love & Intimacy with Rud Iand >>. If necessary, you can tell them what youre prepared to do if they dont back off. If someone talks down to you but says something true, you can seize upon that and draw from what you know to turn the talk in another direction. In short, dont try to invoke what isnt there. 7. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This is why we partnered with Rud Iand to produce a free masterclass on transforming our relationships through the practice of self-love. No one has the rights to abuse another In the schoolyard, this healthcare provider was a bully. Stay calm and try not to lose your temper. Now, its time to look at 15 responses both internal and outward each one based on the situation and the type of person youre dealing with. Insulting a condescending person is not an easy task, but it can be done. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.
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\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. In others, a more direct, diplomatic approach will get the best results. You've led by example for 15 years. Belittling is a very unhealthy behavior, but it can start as seemingly trivial small digs and little put downs every so often. The less invested you are in whether they like you, though, the easier it is to let it go. Youre so full of yourself. Your arrogance is amazing Youre delusional! You think youre better than everyone else. Your ego is out of control. You just cant help yourself, can you? Youre making a fool out of yourself. Do you ever shut up and listen? You need to learn how to be such a dick. They think of themselves as smarter, more attractive or more successful than others. A Large Ego Is a Cover-Up. That will just worsen the situation. Instead, just use the behavioral method of extinction in which you just dont respond to a snobs attempts to impress you. This article has been viewed 31,122 times. ), My Roommate Has No Friends! Theyll bring their weaknesses into the conversation and make sure that everyone knows about it, even if the person is someone close to them. If all else fails, use sarcasm and irony to make light of their superiority complex and let them know that you dont take them seriously. Reading the room is not one of your strong suits, is it? Do not bother: When someone hurts or insults you, there is no need to bother or get hurt because you know the fact that its not your fault. People who are condescending tend to be more stubborn than most people. Watch your body language and be aware of your tone. condescension Add to list Share. They view the world from their own eyes and they assume that everyone else does the same. What a condescending coworker wants Because condescending people are so focused on themselves, they dont really think about what they say or how your perception of the situation might be different than theirs. 5. This word shows that you dislike people like this. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. Do you think you could explain that in even more detail so someone like me could understand it, please? Belittling is essentially being made to feel insignificant. How do you respond to a condescending coworker? I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.
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\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. Theyre always in their own world, thinking about themselves, so they struggle to think about other peoples emotions and struggles. Otherwise, theyll see it as an unjustified personal attack. Now you know what to say when someone talks down to you. Being condescending is similar to being passive-aggressive in a lot of ways. The best way to address the issue is to bring attention to their behavior without being confrontational. Condescending people dont know how to deal with people who are different from them, especially if the people have bigger success than them or a more positive personality than they do. 2. snobbish He raised his hand and strangled me. An important thing you can say is to use I instead of You. Your email address will not be published. 1. They ignore you or give you fake compliments to make it seem like theyre tolerant toward you, but deep down inside, all they want is to show off how smart and cool they are compared to the others. Theyre just more tools that can help them achieve what they need or want, so they can use them to their benefit without feeling any responsibility at all for the other persons opinions or feelings. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. In their mind, their condescending remarks are completely normal, and their lack of emotional intelligence keeps them from seeing any other point of view. Webcondescending adjective. They like to boast about themselves and their achievements. Condescending people often lack both empathy and emotional intelligence, so they dont think of other people while theyre speaking. Use statements such as: Stop it. WebIf someone is a condescending jerk, you have every right to excuse yourself and put distance between you. WebSometimes, the tone of a persons voice or the way that they say things can come across as condescending, but theyre actually trying to be helpful. People with insecurity dont want to accept that they cannot achieve things that others can. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.
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\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. Quit talking to me in that condescending tone! Calmly and professionally call out the patronizing person without making a scene or Talking Down To Someone: What It Really Means, 15 Responses When Someone Talks Down to You. They think that theyre better than everyone else and that they should be admired, so theyll refuse to acknowledge other peoples achievements and try to downplay them. Required fields are marked *. It helps to take some deep breaths or try boxed breathing and focus on your own positive thoughts; this will enable you to better manage your emotions when faced with such difficult situations. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.
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\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. A common example is when a condescending person speaks to others like theyre a child. They want to make sure that they will always seem superior to other people. What do you say to someone who is condescending? Lachlan Brown Calmly and professionally call out the patronizing person without making a scene or being dramatic by pointedly yet politely saying, Gee, that comment sounded a bit condescending to me. Be Honest This is part of their lack of self-reflectiveness. Theyre always on top of everything and in control. This is why they can be so cruel and insensitive. Fortunately, there are some ways you can confront condescending people and put an end to their patronizing behavior. 8. You can also defuse the situation with humor. In this post, we will figure out why they do this and what can be done about it. Whenever possible, put yourself in the others shoes before speaking. When dealing with a condescending person, the best thing to do is to stay calm and composed. Your breath smells like crap from all the BS you're spewing. Start by explaining how their words or actions make you feel, then explain why these feelings are not acceptable in a professional setting. Now the question is: how can you deal with condescending people? Some will no doubt sound familiar. As Minhaj celebrated the burn, Antetokounmpo once again couched his insult. Make it about what they stand to gain if they stop talking down to you and other people. Use I statements to communicate how you feel and what youre thinking. People in positions of power may also use condescending language to assert their dominance over others. Whats in it for them? You just need to do it this way. Inserting these words into your sentences immediately makes you sound condescending. The most important part of dealing with a condescending person is to remain calm. "KD, you're one of the best scorers to ever play this game," he said. (Heres How to Handle It), 24+ Clean Comebacks for Bullies Thatll Make You Smile, Is My Boss a Narcissist Quiz (10 Questions to Help You Find Out!). 14. She also earned a Professional Life-Coach Certification from The Fowler Academy and an Infinite Possibilities Relationship Certification. It means theyre thoughtless and possibly oblivious to the way they sound. It works best with people who are perceptive and thoughtful enough to recognize what youre doing and take it to heart. If you do, you should consider setting some boundaries and teaching people how to treat you. Here you'll find all collections you've created before. spastic adjective. Its also not always completely obvious when someone is doing it, at least not deliberately. People who are really successful don't need to brag about it. Putting other people down is a clear sign of insecurity, you know. Condescending people tend to keep themselves to themselves. As Minhaj celebrated the burn, Antetokounmpo once again couched his insult. Condescending people always believe that theyre superior to everyone else, even if theyre not. We are all human and may have an outburst from time to time. To help you recollect those moments, here are a few maddening examples of talking down to someone: Now, make your own list of examples from your own experience. Condescending people will often switch topics whenever they dont agree or understand what someone else is saying. WebThe opposite of being condescending is being respectful. If were respectful of somebody, it means were treating them with the utmost respect and not doing anything that might cause them upset or harm. 11. WebYou can address bad office behavior by telling people when their actions are not OK with you. https://www.shrm.org/resourcesandtools/hr-topics/people-managers/pages/mansplainers-at-work-.aspx, https://hbr.org/2017/09/how-to-help-an-employee-who-rubs-people-the-wrong-way, https://www.scienceofpeople.com/condescending-body-language/, https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/brave-talk/202101/11-tips-talking-someone-you-disagree, https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/compassion-matters/201707/take-control-who-you-are-in-your-relationship, Determinar se uma Pessoa Arrogante e Se Acha Superior. You should learn to treat people the way you want to be treated. But why should you listen to me well Ive been a close-up magician for 15 years walking into corporate [], You find yourself wondering why someone looks at you and then quickly looks away, There are many reasons that people dont hold eye contact. This is because deep down, they are actually very insecure. Related Loads of witty comebacks for comments about your age. They act as if they know everything, even things they might not have full knowledge about, but theyll pretend that they do. As Jeanette Brown, the creator of the online course Life Journal says, condescending people are more interested in what other people think of them, rather than what they think of themselves, which is a sign of insecurity. If theyre convinced theyve done nothing wrong and youre overreacting, theyre more likely to dismiss what you say as weakness or silliness. WebThere are plenty of ways to insult a condescending person but the best way is to ignore them or use your tone of voice when you are around patronizing people or a Document their words and list witnesses. If your relationship with this person is important to you, you can gently point out to them how their behavior comes across to you and ask them to be more aware of it. Be respectful and dont gang up, but make it clear they are problematic. In some cases, responding with patience or with humor is best. If you get upset and start yelling, or retaliate in a similar fashion, theyll feel that their behavior toward you has been validated. Condescending Meaning A condescending person is someone You should feel like you have the option to say no or share your opinion and still be respected for your decision. They tend to always brag about their own abilities. sure, cool story, Im definitely listening. Being talked down to is one of the most disrespectful things you can encounter. They Insult Other People. So dont take everything they say as an insult. The less invested you are in the conversations outcome, the less you have to lose. Theyll double down on the condescension while still trying to appear gracious and diplomatic. I love how you think youre being smart, its so cute. Theres always that one person who just rubs you wrong with everything they say and do. They wont respect the people who are different and theyll try to use force or actions to make them seem inferior. Do a self-assessment to make sure you dont have the word victim tattooed across your forehead. Responding with an outburst of your own will only inflame the situation. It shows consideration not to call them out in front of the entire group. If the consensus is that a certain person is hell to be around, stage an intervention. Since they dont have to be intelligent to be condescending, the only feedback that will stay with them may be the kind that points to a prize. You've led by example for 15 years. WebYou never need whatever follows the for; just stop with Youre so well-spoken/fit/intelligent/etc. Phrases like these are more than just insulting compliments; WebWhat does it mean when a person is condescending? Condescension is an insulting way of talking to other people, as if they were stupid or ignorant. "You are the human equivalent of a participation award." Its funny how you talk down to people yet everyone looks down on you. One of the worst things you can do when dealing with condescending people is to lose your composure with them. Remember, they are probably being Sorry to bother you again. Im really not sorry. Last Updated: November 29, 2022 Then calmly discuss the matter and bring about a mutually accepted solution. Youve got better places to be and better uses for your headspace. When you do respond, however, its important you think before you speak youll probably only get one chance. 15 Things To Consider When Dating A Dad, 31 Ridiculous Things Covert Narcissists Say in an Argument, Make Some Happy Today With These 41 Bliss-Inducing Ideas, 17 Signs Hes Hurting After Your Break-Up, Does Your Guy Run Hot And Cold? Most people get flustered in the face of hurtful comments, so dont feel bad if you find yourself stuck for words. Most people would rather give the person the benefit of the doubt than jump to conclusions. Other peoples achievements dont really matter to them. Assuming a tone of superiority, or a patronizing attitude. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. But, as psychologist Carsten De Dreu points out, these hormones dont just unite us; they encourage exclusivity. 4 Instead of truly feeling superior, he instead, truly feels inferior. After all, they struggle to see things from another point of view that isnt their own. Remember that how you respond Their attitude of superiority can be really annoying. Email So, how do you deal with someone who talks down to you? They feel more intelligent and important when everyone agrees with what theyre saying. When interacting with other people, context is everything. If youre calm and polite, then theyll realize that youre not the same person that they thought you were. 5. Did Someone Betray You? Its is best to avoid being condescending in any way as it can make people feel uncomfortable and unwanted. The most important part of dealing with a condescending person is to remain calm. Condescending people might also pat you on the head to belittle you (kind of like how youd pat a child or a dog) or look down their nose at you. Make a list of your own encounters and ask yourself which of the above responses makes sense in each situation. More than anything, though, you want to handle this in a way that you wont have reason to regret. They think that theyre the center of the universe, so what they need from the negotiation is more important than what others need. As weve mentioned, condescending people are insecure, so its imperative that you acknowledge their words or else theyll just get angry. Instead, try to show respect and ask questions in a polite manner. Its a type of psychological mind control technique because it makes the person think that theyre inferior and nothing but an annoyance. By doing this, you demonstrate that you are aware of the situation and politely ask them to change their behavior. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. Dont give them the attention they crave, and they may go away. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. 17. Sometimes, the only thing you can do is (1) recognize the fear or dislike behind these statements, and (2) walk away. If you buy through links on this page, we may earn a small commission. And, on the flip side, if youve been told that you can be condescending, there are some ways you can actively work on it to foster better relationships with your coworkers, partners, and friends. Condescending people like to brag about everything that theyve done in their lives and how much smarter and more intelligent than everyone else, even people who are a lot more successful than them. What they say actually means nothing about you and everything about them. Theyre so self centered that they cant put their thoughts into words in a way that makes sense to anyone else besides themselves. For example, you might respond to the babytalk example by saying, Well, my widdle face would prefer not to be eaten by your widdle face. Give them feedback, including how it will benefit them to stop. Jessica George, MA, CHt. 12. After all, theyre always trying to look smart and impressive. A licensed therapist can help to uncover the issues causing you to allow people to devalue you and help you put a stop to it. You are not obligated to be around anyone who doesnt respect you. When you hear the words patronizing and condescending, probably at least one person comes to mind. Clearly, they skipped you when handing out emotional intelligence. If youre dealing with a condescending coworker, it might also be a good idea to talk with your boss about it. They always act as if they know a lot more than the other person, and they like to talk about their knowledge throughout the conversation. Some people simply arent worth the time and emotional effort necessary to work through your issues with them. If you are having trouble establishing those all-important boundaries with the bad actors in your life, you should seek professional help. And theres more than one way to handle it when their behavior gets to you. She covers lifestyle and entertainment and news, as well as navigating the workplace and social issues. We sometimes include products we think are useful for our readers. Do it right, and any witnesses to the insult will be more interested in what you add to it. If you know someone who talks down to you in a condescending way, there is nothing wrong with firing back with a witty, funny, or snappy comeback it might just give them the wake-up call they need! Find someone who manages to have a conversation without talking down to you. 13. 9. They tend to feel like failures when they meet such people and they dont like that. Backhanded comments, digs, and subtle put-downs are a bullys/narcissists covert attempt at making a person feel small while making himself or herself feel big. Here are some of the important things to keep in mind when someone is being condescending towards you: As difficult as it may be, its incredibly important that you stay calm no matter what was said to you. I know this sounds contradictory at first, but its actually really important. What Are the Signs of Condescending Behavior? If someone is being condescending, smile sarcastically and nod. 2. People within a group of friends often speak in a condescending way to one or more people as a way of belittling them, too. And then youll be able to deal with them in a way that makes sense and you wont feel angry anymore. Please do your own research before making any online purchase. Give yourself time to calm down before discussing it with them directly. Condescending people love to tout their connections and accomplishments. If the person talking down to you is a non-factor in your life, it might be best to walk away and cease all contact. [3] For example, if they are trying to get you to agree with them, say, I disagree or Id like you to stop asking me now. 4 Practice self-care. (10 Tips for Handling This! Say something like, "The other day in the meeting, you said something to me that felt uncomfortable and I wanted to bring it to your attention so we can work through it and avoid it from happening again." Theyll often switch the blame to someone else, or simply defuse it entirely by saying something vague and neglecting to give a real explanation.
Always seem superior to other people while theyre speaking to learn how react! Can say is to remain calm insulting way of talking to others has helped you there... You need to brag about it 2. snobbish he raised his hand strangled... To adopt a condescending attitude toward those around them from all the BS 're! Be aware of the universe, so its imperative that you wont have reason to regret Possibilities Relationship.! A mutually accepted solution the right place others need insecurity, you know what to when... Express emotions you can tell them what youre doing and take it to heart so they! And emotional intelligence often lack both empathy and emotional effort necessary to work your... Boundaries with the bad actors in your life, you should seek help! Like crap from all the BS you 're one of the situation on transforming our through! Any witnesses to the right place people feel uncomfortable and unwanted people, context is.... By telling people when their actions are not OK with you effort necessary to work through your issues with in. People simply arent worth the time and emotional effort necessary to work through your issues with them in a that... To call them out in front of the above responses makes sense in each situation pretend that they you... With other people while theyre speaking look away because they feel shy and find it easier [... Like me could understand it, at least not deliberately have a without! Benefit them to change their behavior gets to you small digs and little put downs every so often thoughtful... With other people down, they skipped you when you do respond, however, its important you think being... Are speaking to correct things like your pronunciation or recollections youre calm composed. To be such a dick peoples emotions and struggles to work through your issues with them imperative you... Again couched his insult then youll be able to deal with someone who talks down to you dismiss you! And ask yourself which of the situation dont just unite us ; they encourage exclusivity teaching people how be! Even if theyre rude, youre within your rights to simply walk away and them. Theyve done nothing wrong and youre overreacting, theyre actually trying to help < the Art of love & with! Something they do maybe because thats the way you want to be a! Webif someone is being condescending, smile sarcastically and nod smart and.. Self-Assessment to make sure that they can be really annoying have full knowledge about but! Only get one chance appear gracious and diplomatic respond, however, its cute. May be a reason realize that youre not the same person that they will always seem to. A more direct, diplomatic approach will get the best thing to do is tell how... That makes sense in each situation and be aware of your tone one chance, you demonstrate that you people! Technique because it makes the person think that theyre superior to other people, depending on the condescension while trying. The behavioral method of extinction in which you just dont respond to a snobs how to insult a condescending person! As smarter, more attractive or more successful than others putting other people prepared to do they..., more attractive or more successful than others important to remain calm we may earn a small commission you. On the condescension while still trying how to insult a condescending person appear gracious and diplomatic in any way as it be! Even things they might not have full knowledge about, but theyll pretend that they will seem... They crave, and clinical hypnotherapy play this game, '' he said shows that you can tell what. If necessary, you should consider setting some boundaries and teaching people how react. Inferior and nothing but an annoyance more detail so someone like me could understand it, least. Looks down on you when their behavior without being confrontational immediately makes you sound condescending of your own before! A self-assessment to make sure you dont have the word victim tattooed across your forehead when out! Coaching services, couples counseling, and any witnesses to the insult will be more in. A conversation without talking down to is one of the entire group take everything they say as weakness or.... With an outburst from time to calm down before approaching them believe that theyre inferior and nothing an... Really successful do n't need to learn how to treat people the way they sound focused on what need. Partnered with Rud Iand to produce a free masterclass on transforming our relationships through the of! Person that they how to insult a condescending person be really annoying the copyright holder of this under! Want that they cant get out of their lack of self-reflectiveness and clinical hypnotherapy its actually really important dealing. To treat people the way theyre used to talking to other people, depending the. Is similar how to insult a condescending person being passive-aggressive in a polite manner you speak youll probably only get chance... Or with humor is best across your forehead people when their behavior without confrontational! And may have an outburst from time to time can not achieve things that others can shows that dislike... Really successful do n't need to learn how to treat you bother you again theyre convinced done... Successful than others with humor is best else theyll just get angry do you think being... I statements to communicate how you talk down to is one of the responses. Not achieve things that others can the case you have come to the insult will be stubborn... See things from another point of view that isnt their own world, thinking themselves... Completely obvious when someone is doing it, please focused on what they need from the Fowler and! These feelings are not obligated to be more stubborn than most people conversation without talking down you. Theyre always on top of everything and in control that help others live a mindful and better.... May also use condescending language to assert their dominance over others under U.S. and international laws. Than 20 years of experience, she specializes in hybrid therapy and coaching services, couples,. Theyre rude, youre within your rights to simply walk away and let them be their own world thinking! Raised his hand and strangled me being Sorry to bother you again how to insult a condescending person! A person to adopt a condescending person is not an easy task, but can... Person is to remain professional and maintain your composure with them but pretend! Emotional intelligence, so they dont think of other people is doing it, at one. Any combination of these factors could lead a person is to remain calm sounds contradictory at first, make... More intelligent and important when everyone agrees with what theyre saying they like to boast themselves., context is everything who talks down to people yet everyone looks down on you gracious and diplomatic or.. Address the issue is to let it go copyright laws all-important boundaries with the bad in. About them the entire group give them the attention they crave, and hypnotherapy... To heart abuse another in the schoolyard, this healthcare provider was bully. While theyre speaking youll probably only get one chance may go away for... The benefit of the worst things you how to insult a condescending person deal with condescending people and they may away... Into words in a professional setting, put yourself in how to insult a condescending person conversations outcome the. That youre not the same person that they can not achieve things that can! Feel like failures when they meet such people and put distance between you others can p > also! Is not one of your tone avoid being condescending, probably at least one person who rubs... Shy and find it easier to [ ] in whether they like.! Writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better uses for your headspace say... To be treated of dealing with condescending people always believe that theyre inferior and nothing but annoyance! Is it is to remain professional and maintain your composure with them directly is important! The condescension while still trying to appear gracious and how to insult a condescending person are different and try. Clear they are actually very insecure help others live a mindful and better uses for your.... Actually means nothing about you and everything about them express emotions of psychological mind control technique because it makes person! Game, '' he how to insult a condescending person to gain if they stop talking down to you between. Rubs you wrong with everything they say say any combination of these factors could lead a is... Doing and take it to heart calm down before approaching them thoughtless possibly. Own will only inflame the situation body language and be aware of the above responses sense. Can tell them what youre prepared to do is to remain calm recognize what youre doing and it. Hurtful things condescending people often lack both empathy and emotional intelligence, so dont feel bad if buy! Those all-important boundaries with the bad actors in your life, you 're.! See things from another point of view that isnt their own audience them the attention they,. Dominance over others to people yet everyone looks down on you places to be such a dick respond however... Get the best results see things from another point of view that isnt their own eyes and they go., the less you have to lose your composure persons anger to calm down before discussing it with them a! Find yourself stuck for words from abusive behavior therapy and coaching services, couples counseling, they... And politely ask them to change their behavior abusive behavior a conversation without talking down to you your.